QUESTION? / COMMENT !

I struggle from the effects of paternal sexual abuse followed by being given to a Satanic Cult for their abuse by my father.  Because of that abuse and possible programming, I have had much difficulty in accepting the tenets of our faith.   Yes, I underwent the Rite of Exorcism; but unbelief and being triggered by spiritual issues still prevail.  Anyway, I just wanted to say thank you for this wonderful list of resources, https://jesseromero.com/blog/skeptic-says-bible-full-errors , to challenge what my mind is telling me.  In the past I have tried reading myself into believing.  I had to stop all of that because of serious triggers to suicidal ideation a while back.  Currently, I cannot attend Mass, pray, etc., though the desire to do so still exists, someday, without being triggered.  

ANSWER! / COMMENT!

May the light of Christ come upon you and give you grace and strength. Christianity attracts people from all walks of life, from people with high IQ's, the Greatest Scientist and the Greatest Legal minds, yet it can only be embraced with the humble heart of a child. God did not design the Catholic Faith and the Bible to be a dark puzzle for bright scholars, but to be a bright lamp for travelers through a dark world. Free will is a gift given by God, it cannot be taken away by satan, he can harrass, torment, vex, annoy you but your free will is under your dominion. 

The only way you will be healed, liberated and delivered from this affliction is by returning to the sacraments and a dedicated life of prayer throughout the day. 

Your free will is NOT in bondage, any passage in Scripture where God commands, demands or obligates his people to do something because such a command presupposes the ability of the one commanded to choose to obey. Thus, when Scripture says, “Unless you repent you will all likewise perish as they did” (Luke 13:3) one would have to ask, “If no one has free will, why did Jesus bother commanding repentance (cf. Matt 4:17)?” Consider that if we had no free will, Jesus command would be similar to commanding a chair to move. Of course, since chairs have no free will it would be absurd for something (or someone for that matter) without free will to do something that cannot possibly be done. Such a command would be utterly meaningless. In relation to God who is love. If love isn’t’ freely given, then love has no value. God only commands what he makes possible.

I would recommend two people that can assist you in returning back to a normal Catholic sacramental life. Contact either:

Nicole Sablan (https://www.mogc.org/) - she is a Catholic Therapist who is rooted in the teachings of the Church.

Janet Smith (http://janetsmith.org)- she is a moral theologian who helps woman who have been deeply wounded through sexual abuse.